Bit of a personal one from me today. It’s all about letting go and not worrying. I’ve only experienced this in maybe the last couple of months or so.
I have always been a worrier, always felt like I had a lot on my shoulders and a lot to live up to. I grew up being very shy and a total introvert. My parents were very protective of me (still are). Looking back I really lacked confidence, sometimes it was really isolating – I always wondered how the people who were really confident did it?! For me, I always worried what people thought of me. That really stuck with me for most of my school life. I mean I can’t regret it because thats just how I was, but as I’ve got older I think I’ve naturally just gained some confidence, which was very much needed. Probably through working and meeting new people, you sort of just got to, even if you’re faking it! ‘Fake it till’ you make it’ as they say 🙂
In this day and age, there seems to be a lot to be judged on; how you look; job position, what car you got, how much money you earn, if your boyfriends (or girlfriends) hot, how many holidays you’ve been on, what you eat, where you live, how many qualifications have, who your friends are. But look – you don’t have to justify any of that. Success doesn’t need to come from any of them. I thought it did. But as I got older, I realised it’s just how I feel, If I am happy I feel successful as a person, if I’ve been kind that day, done a good deed or even if I’ve eaten a piece of fruit (haha).
I believe it is important to try your best but don’t compare your best to someone else’s, as it’ll always be different, some people can do more some people can do less and that’s okay. At the end of the day once you become an adult (when does that start again exactly?) then it really depends how many pressure you want to put on yourself, sometimes you got a lot more than you think. Don’t ever let someone put you down, no one has the authority to do that, accept yourself – and yeah don’t do that either because putting yourself down only means you got to someone bring yourself back up and take it from me chocolate or alcohol isn’t always the answer!
Things that I now notice that must mean I am becoming (more) carefree:
- Buying that mustard top
- Playing my Utravox, OMD and other 80’s classic CDs in the car whilst my friends are present
- Wearing no make up whatsoever
- Wearing converse for most of my days
- Going for a run and looking straight ahead instead of the floor
- Looking people in the eye
- Making a joke even if it isn’t funny
- Sticking up for myself
- Trying everything at least once
- Going to classes and starting conversations
I want to dedicate this post to someone. I don’t even know if she reads my blog (she best do). But I want to say thanks to her that I’ve become a better, less stressed, less worried, happier person. She really does inspire me (noo, this has got too gushy). Kirsty, thanks for being you. What a great human you are and this planet is very lucky to have you.
Anyway enough of you and back to me. I want to end this post by saying that it’s important you take time to think of yourself and go easy, try to like yourself more and make sure you remember everyone does things at their own pace. I think this song is a fitting ending: